


The Gyft That Keeps On Giving

by keelywolfe



Series: by any other name [39]
Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Underfell (Undertale), Alternate Universe - Underswap (Undertale), Christmas Fluff, Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, Fluff, M/M, Panic Attacks, Prejudice Against Monsters (Undertale), Spicyhoney - Freeform, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Underfell Papyrus (Undertale), Underswap Papyrus (Undertale), Undertale Monsters on the Surface, papcest - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-02
Updated: 2018-12-19
Packaged: 2019-09-05 17:24:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,980
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16815130
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/keelywolfe/pseuds/keelywolfe
Summary: 'tis the season...





	1. Chapter 1

* * *

“did you ever notice that if you try to call someone out on their grammar online it almost guarantees that you’ll make a grammar error in your own post?”

Edge didn’t look at Stretch where he was sprawled out on the sofa, tapping away at his phone. “No. Because I have other goals in life than correcting the grammar of strangers on the internet.”

The sofa creaked a little as Stretch rolled over. “please. everyone else does, too, but that doesn’t stop them.”

“Let me rephrase, then. If I started doing it, I’d never be able to stop.”

“now that i’ll buy.”

From every appearance, Edge was completely focused on his laptop, but in truth, a good portion of his attention was on his husband. Stretch was oddly fidgety tonight, but calling him out on it would be useless. Such efforts only led into a dark spiral of nonsense and they’d end up arguing over something like which actor was the best Batman again. Better to wait for him to work out whatever it was he wanted to say on his own. 

It didn’t take too much longer before Stretch asked, “are you going to be working much longer?”

That gave him pause. Stretch rarely interrupted his work. “I can stop now if you like.”

Stretch squirmed, visibly discomfited. “well, i mean, if you’re busy--”

Gently, Edge interrupted him. “Love, what do you need?” 

If he’d been within reach Edge would have pulled him into his lap. As it was, he turned in his chair to give Stretch his full attention. 

“it’s only,” he twisted his fingers together, blurting out, “i have some books to pick up downtown at the bookshop and i was hoping you’d give me a ride.”

That was highly unusual. Edge waited and, as expected, Stretch went on.

“i just…” he took a deep breath and reluctantly continued, “i still get tired kind of easy and taking the bus is fine but it is sort of a process and there’s more walking and shortcuts involved than if you give me a lift.”

Ah. That clarified things. He knew why Stretch hadn’t wanted to ask; doubtless he didn’t want any more worry directed at him. Between Blue and himself he’d had plenty of coddling the past couple of weeks and knowing Stretch as he did, Edge knew that he was probably heartily sick of it. 

“All right,” Edge said evenly, carefully keeping his faint worry out of his voice. “Why don’t we go now? I can do this later tonight after you have your new toys.”

“gee, thanks, dad,” Stretch said dryly, but his smile was warm.

“I don’t think I approve of this new kink of yours in referring to me as a parent. For starters, I’m younger than you.”

“ouch,” Stretch winced. “cold, babe, that was ice cold.”

“It’s only the truth,” Edge said serenely.

Stretch sat up on the sofa with a groan. “and before you ask, i did call the doc, yesterday. just to be on the safe side. she said it was totally normal and it’ll take a little while for me to get back into fighting shape.”

“More like lazing around shape.” But it did give him some relief to hear Stretch was taking this seriously. 

“cute,” he grinned, “anyway, she said to take it easy and not wear myself out.”

“That shouldn’t be a problem for you,” Edge teased, even as his concerns were eased. Stretch had so many contrasts. He would hand Edge his soul without a qualm and yet only grudgingly say when he felt ill.

His love had no trouble showing his affection or his desires. His vulnerability, on the other hand… they’d been dating for over a year before Edge had seen one of his depressive episodes and at the time, it had been less sharing and more of a warning of what he would have to deal with if he continued the relationship.

As if that would change anything. When you loved someone, you loved all of them. You couldn’t cherrypick the best parts and leave the rest. Loving his brother had taught him that.

Abandoning his chair, Edge walked over to Stretch and leaned down, hesitating with their faces inches apart. “May I kiss you?”

Stretch reared back with a suspicious look, “why are you suddenly asking permission?”

“Because normally you seem as if you’d welcome it and right now you don’t. I’m respecting your boundaries.”

Stretch snorted. “yeah, don’t have many of those with you, husband. c’mere.” 

It was less of a kiss and more of a teasing nuzzle, one that Edge leaned into appreciatively, oddly warmed by the simple act of being called husband. He caught hold of Stretch’s hand and automatically starting to press a kiss against his knuckles, then frowned, "Where is your ring?"

Stretch blinked. "...oh, shit, i was swapping them out after i left the lab this morning and i think i got a text in the middle of it. i must've left it upstairs." His honest dismay made Edge shake his head. 

"Stay here, I'll get it." He left Stretch on the sofa and went upstairs to their room. 

On his side of the dresser, Stretch had a ceramic disembodied zombie hand that looked as if it were thrusting itself out of the ground. He'd found the horrible thing at a thrift shop and Edge detested it but as it wasn't a clown hand, he'd grudgingly allowed it a space. It definitely added something to the neat display of cologne bottles and Edge’s valet box. Something awful.

In its wretched palm were a few coins, a Canadian loony, what looked like a fake British fifty pence with a pirate's face instead of the Queen, and one that Edge picked up to look at closer, trying to decipher its point of origin. India, perhaps? He put it back with an amused sigh. Stretch's rings were on the third finger of the decrepit hand and Edge gingerly retrieved the metal one. Even knowing it was only painted ceramic didn’t make him want to actually touch it. 

As he turned back towards the door, a flash of bright color caught his eye and he turned to see a flyer lying on the foot of their bed. Curiously, he glanced at it to see an advertisement for the annual downtown Holiday Walk, which would include a variety of interesting activities, such as tree lighting ceremony, puppet shows, and…oh. A display of antique cars and motorcycles held in a large heated tent. ‘Heated’ was printed in bold. 

With a spark of excitement lighting in him, Edge glanced at the dates. His sockets narrowed as he saw it was starting today, at six. A glance at the clock told him it was half past five right now. 

Picking up books, indeed. It had been a very good plan, too, ruined only by a carelessly left flyer. 

Schooling his expression to impassive, he went back downstairs to find Stretch already in his coat and sliding on his shoes. Without a word, Edge retrieved two knit hats from the closet, putting one on and slipping the other over Stretch’s skull, pulling it down over his face.

“i’m going to be in the car,” Stretch protested, pushing it up enough that he could see.

“You’ll need to walk from the house to the car and from the car to the shop,” Edge countered. And walking downtown in the cold for probably hours, but Edge wouldn’t have spoiled that surprise for the world. Instead of trying to force gloves on him, Edge only tucked an extra pair into his pocket as he retrieved his keys. 

At the door, he took a moment to catch Stretch’s hand in his own, carefully sliding his ring back into place.

“you like doing that, don’t you,” Stretch smirked. 

Edge pressed a gentle kiss against both the ring and the finger. “I do,” Edge admitted. Silent proof that Stretch was his, as much as he was Stretch’s. Then he guided him out the door to the car with a hand at the small of Stretch’s spine.

On the ride, Stretch was still fidgety, toying with his ring, his lighter. Now Edge could see it was only nervous excitement. His own eagerness was carefully concealed, held back to be revealed soon enough. His acting skills weren’t the greatest, but he could at least offer genuine delight. 

Faced with what was sure to be Stretch’s glee, he didn’t think it wouldn’t be too difficult. 

tbc


	2. Chapter 2

The lights were astonishing, Stretch had to admit. Even though it wasn’t completely dark yet, the entire downtown of Ebott was glowing in draped lights, decorations strewn over everything that would hold still and a few things that wouldn’t. It was gorgeous, far more extravagant than anything Snowdin had ever managed and the thrill of seeing it was only very slightly diminished by the fact that Edge had somehow figured out where they were going.

Stretch had been so sure he had him this time. He'd found out about an event before Edge had, one that Edge was sure to love. This time, he would be the one with a surprise.

He'd recruited Janice into helping; she'd been making sure Edge’s work mail was clean of any flyers or newspaper advertisements. The kid who brought their morning paper was doing the same and Stretch had hacked his computer into hiding anything in the community newsletters. He'd missed something, though, probably something stupid, and Edge had figured it out. 

Oh, Edge tried to hide it but he was shit at keeping secrets. To begin with, in spite of his claim to hate parental pet names, he just couldn’t stop himself from playing mama bear, as evidenced by the gloves that had miraculously appeared at the exact moment Stretch’s hands got cold. It didn’t take a PhD to add those to the hat Edge had forced on him, along with his complete lack of surprise when they’d gotten downtown. If he hadn’t been so obviously excited, Stretch would have been more miffed but eh, it would be petty to stay mad. Better to appreciate the simple fact that his baby was hard to fool.

All Stretch had to do was pretend he didn’t know that Edge knew. Luckily, he was a hell of a lot better at acting.

They’d hit the tent with the antique cars first and Edge had instantly been lost to him, given over the motorized bliss. His spectacularly aloof husband had actually spent a little time talking to the owners of the cars, going over different things about the engines and the rebuilding processes with charming enthusiasm.

Stretch had been immediately bored. Oh, he understood it all, engines weren’t exactly complex, and cars were okay, but whatever gene Papyrus and Edge had that made cars their bread and butter, Stretch must’ve donated for the cause. Maybe if he could actually drive…

If modern cars did nothing for him, then classic cars did even less, death traps every one of them , and he was simply grateful that Edge preferred safety features over style.

The motorcycles were worse but boring as it was, Stretch was helpless in the face of Edge’s sincere delight and he sneaked a few pictures every time one of the owners let Edge straddle their bike. Death traps, yeah, but sexy as hell when Edge was part of the snare.

It was sort of amusing to figure out that many of the interestingly tattooed humans with their motorcycles were doctors and lawyers and executives, that kind of shit. Those things cost serious cash, couldn’t get one of those bikes on a low income. All that shiny chrome and pretty paint jobs cost G, Stretch had been reluctantly taught. 

Hopefully Edge would appreciate from the distance and not want to start a collection, even if they could afford it.

The sun had gone completely down by the time they’d escaped the warmth of the tent. The entire downtown was crowded with displays. Booths were set up where vendors were selling their wares of wreathes and decorations. Wasn’t much doubt that they were going to be leaving with a trunkful, he’d already caught Edge eying a display of handmade ornaments.

Edge loved Gyftmas, he was fooling exactly no one about that. Didn’t take much of a genius to figure out that Underfell probably hadn’t run with much in the way of celebrating it. 

Their tasteful decorations had been put up on the first day of December, with the amount of ridiculous ornaments carefully rationed. Stretch had been allowed the sleigh and six pack one, (Santa and his reinbeer), and exactly one clown but no amount of persuasion would get Edge to let him put up the caganer that Stretch had found, more’s the pity.

Edge had told him on no uncertain terms that he could have a shitting Santa displayed when they moved to Spain and not a second sooner.

Spoilsport.

Stretch had ended up giving it to Red, who had been delighted with it and thus proved himself to be the brother with a real sense of humor.

In the center of the town square a stage of sorts had been set up for the puppet show, an old school Punch and Judy, and that was where Edge had left him while he attended the awards ceremony for the classic cars. Much as he loved his baby, Stretch had had more than enough of vehicles for the day and he’d rather sit and giggle over the show, live tweeting for the delight of his twitter followers.

There were only a few other Monsters in the crowd, a disappointing sight. Ever since the fire at the Beanery, Stretch had noticed less Monsters on the bus when he went into town. They were afraid, and worst of all, Stretch couldn’t assure them they were wrong. 

The Embassy had come out with a public announcement to instruct Monsters on how to stay safe in the city, along with what to do if they were arrested or detained. A good idea, yeah, but probably not all that reassuring. It was disheartening, to say the least, but maybe if he tweeted about the holiday events, showed that even a Monster with low HP could be safe downtown, more Monsters would come. It was worth a try.

It would probably make Ass-gore happy, too, but that was a price Stretch was willing to pay.

Edge hadn’t returned by the time the show ended and Stretch wandered over to where the vendors were selling food and drinks. He was starting to get cold and if Edge thought he was shivering, he'd be trying to persuade him it was time to go. But the tree lighting wasn’t far away now and Stretch wanted to see it. A hot drink would help.

The line for cocoa was long, filled with restless children and the people behind the counter were working as quickly as they could. Stretch snapped a quick picture of the brightly decorated station and tweeted it as he waited, and it was just as he was stepping up to the counter that he heard from behind.

“Why is that _thing_ even getting a drink, it’s a waste for a human who needs it!”

Startled, Stretch turned to see the line all looking at a woman who was standing several people back, her children huddled around her legs. She was glaring at him as if he’d personally snatched a cup from her toddler’s mouth.

A murmur went through the crowd and Stretch swallowed hard. Everyone was either looking at him or the woman, uneasily.

She sneered at him, “It’s disgusting that that thing is even here. Christmas is for humans, not those monstrosities!”

He should walk away. That was what they’d pounded into his skull. Walk or take a shortcut if needs be, never confront. He should, he was _supposed_ to, but damn it, he hadn't been doing anything. As evenly as he could, anger and fear trembling in his words, Stretch began, “i have every right to…”

“Shut up.”

Stretch faltered, flinching from the deeper voice and blinking hard as frustrated tears stung his sockets. He couldn’t possibly stand up to an angry crowd, and Edge would be next in line to murder him if he tried. Then he realized it wasn’t directed at him. 

Another Human stepped up, leaving a young girl standing in line as he walked over to the blustering woman. He was only a little shorter than Stretch and with his leather jacket and visible tattoos, he made an imposing figure. With a jolt, Stretch realized he recognized him; he’d been in the tent with the motorcycles, and he’d talked briefly with Edge. 

He moved to stand between the woman and Stretch, blocking her mostly from his sight. He could still hear her, shrilly, “I was only saying what everyone is thinking!”

“No, you’re not and I don’t give a shit if you are,” the man said flatly. He had a thick accent that Stretch couldn’t identify past southern United States. “I’m up here visiting with my little girl, I get one weekend with her then I’ll miss her the rest of December. And you, ma’am, are spoiling our day. So shut up and let the guy get his drink.”

“Yeah, get out of here with that crap!” Another human called and a murmur of agreement went through the line. The woman sputtered and Stretch could only barely see her storming away, her children in tow.

A smattering of applause followed the man as he rejoined his daughter in line. Stretch gave him a weak, relieved smile and turned back to the counter, where a young teenager was waiting, cocoa in hand.

“It’s on the house,” she said apologetically. “I’m so sorry about all that.” She raised her voice to carry out to the crowd. “Not all humans are like that, I promise.” A cheer of agreement rose up.

“i know, and it wasn’t your fault at all.” He pulled out his wallet and handed her a hundred dollar bill. “can i pay for all the people behind me at least?”

“Hell, yeah, Merry Christmas!” Piped up from somewhere in the line and laughter followed.

He stepped to the side and waited, sipping his cocoa, until the leather jacket-clad Human and his daughter made it through the line. Taking a deep breath, he stepped up to them.

“thank you,” he said, sincerely. “i’m stretch.” A little cautiously, he held out his hand and the man shook it firmly.

“Roy,” he grunted. “I know who you are, my kid loves your Twitter. If I hadn’t said anything, she would’ve, and probably not as nicely, right, Tam?”

From the way his daughter was shuffling her feet, peering up at him shyly, Stretch had his doubts. He crouched down a little, more to her height, and gave her a friendly grin. He wasn’t very good at gauging the ages of kids, Human or Monsters, but he figured she was maybe about twelve? “hey, kiddo. sorry, my twitter is probably a little not so kid-friendly, huh?

“I’m sure she’s heard worse.” Her father said dryly and Stretch laughed.

“your name is tam? that’s pretty cool,” he tried and she finally met his eye lights, her own eyes wide and startlingly green.

“Can I get a picture with you?” She blurted, wringing her gloved hands. “No one in my class will believe I met you!”

Oh, well, hey, minor celebrity status was cool. “hey, sure, if i can get one with you, yeah? maybe i can post it to my twitter?”

That offer seemed a bit too much and she fell back into stammering shyness. Not so much that she couldn’t stand eagerly next to him while he took a few selfies. By the end, they were both making faces at the camera and laughing, her father watching with an expression of bemused indulgence that Stretch was accustomed to getting from Edge. No one else paid them any mind except for the occasional amused glance and it made his soul glow with warmth that even the outside chill couldn’t dampen.

He let her get a few pictures with her own phone before he stood. “what’s your twitter handle, so i can follow you?”

She rattled it off happily, already tapping away at her phone, probably texting pictures to half her class.

“Thanks,” Roy said gruffly. He ruffled his daughter’s hair. “Better than meeting Santa, right, kid?”

“Much better,” She piped up gleefully and Stretch staggered back a step as she abruptly threw herself at his legs, hugging him tightly. “Thank you! It was so nice to meet you!”

“you too, kiddo. better visit santa anyway, his gifts are better,” Stretch grinned and as he turned, he caught a glimpse of Edge out of the corner of his eye. He was lingering back, watching them with a strange expression on his face.

Eh, he hoped he hadn’t already heard about the great cocoa spat, there was no way he’d want to stay for the tree lighting if he had.

Tam followed his gaze, her eyes going wide, “Is that your husband?”

“yeah, but he’s a little shy,” he whispered loudly, his voice carrying enough that Edge rolled his eye lights. “let’s wave to him, okay?”

He crouched down again and together, he and Tam waved enthusiastically.

Edge raised one hand and gave a curt salute back. 

Close enough.

He stood back up. “i gotta get going, kiddo, you have fun with your dad, okay?”

“Okay,” she said happily and Stretch watched them walk away, Tam already chattering excitedly.

Well, that had been weird. Fun, but weird. He walked over to Edge, ready to offer him half a cup of lukewarm cocoa and whatever excuse that would let them stay for the tree lighting. 

It was all good, he’d come up with something. If nothing else, Stretch was good at thinking on his feet.

TBC


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: This chapter has a reference to a panic attack.

* * *

The best way to approach Edge after a near-catastrophe, Stretch had long since decided, was to pretend nothing had happened. Fly casual, get the conversation going, and hopefully Edge would be distracted enough to let it go.

It had never worked, but that didn’t mean Stretch was going to give up trying.

“hey, babe!” Stretch called out as he walked towards him, maybe a little too brightly and definitely too loud, “i was…oh, hey, what did you find?”

The brightly colored bags dangling from Edge’s fingers were infinitely more interesting than his attempt at distraction, anyway. Stretch sincerely hoped none of them held the keys to a new motorcycle.

Without a word, Edge reached into one and pulled out a baggie of cookies tied with a ribbon. Now, see, that was true love, all wrapped up and delivered with sugar and Stretch accepted the bag with greedy delight, trading Edge his half-empty cocoa cup. Each cookie was carefully decorated, a tree, a Santa, a bell, and with familiar flare.

"did you decorate these?" Stretch asked curiously. Cookie decorating had been on the flyer. 

"I did," Edge said, and the vivid mental picture of Edge towering over a group of kids, meticulously piping icing with his own brand of fierce concentration, made Stretch grin. Shame he'd missed it, now that would have been a hell of an Instagram picture. 

They were very prettily done, but not enough to stop him from tearing it open and munching on them.

“ ’fank you,” he mumbled through crumbs. He cringed away from Edge’s scowl and swallowed before he added, deliberately, “pretty good. not as good as yours.”

Kissing up? Him? Not even a little, it was absolutely true and if it made a little gleam of satisfaction tinge Edge’s eye lights, then that was strictly a bonus. 

They walked aimlessly as Stretch chewed happily on his cookies, admiring the decorations and lights. Edge took a sip of the cocoa and grimaced, although whether it was too cold or too sweet, Stretch wasn’t sure. Probably should see if there was a coffee place, had to be something—

“Who was your friend?” Edge said, interrupting his wandering thoughts. There was a deliberate casualness to it that set off alarm bells in Stretch’s head. Either he was probing for information or he’d already heard about that nasty bitch in the line and was trying to trip Stretch up on a lie about not leaving when he absolutely should have. 

Welp, if Edge wanted a confession, he was going to have to try harder than that.

“a fan,” Stretch said airily. “she follows me on twitter.”

To his surprise, a faint smile twitched at the corners of Edge’s mouth. “A fan, really?”

Okay, so, maybe he hadn’t heard. Probably better to tell him about the whole cocoa fiasco later when it was too late for Edge to cut things short. The way things were going lately, Stretch wasn't going to place bets against Edge carrying him to the car if he thought they weren't perfectly safe.

“yeah, uh, she was super excited to meet me,” Stretch admitted, a little embarrassed. “it was neat. she wanted a few pics to show her friends and since i look fabulous in a selfie, how could i turn her down?”

“I’m sure you couldn’t. You’re very good with children.”

Stretch shrugged and bit the head off his Santa. “i guess. kids are cool, they always love awesome science and have a good sense of humor.” 

“Have you ever thought about having children?” 

He should have caught it there, that faint wistfulness. He should have heard it, he knew Edge better than that, he knew. But the forefront of his thoughts were on cookies and the backend were still lingering on cocoa and nasty humans and what could have happened but didn’t. He didn’t hear it and so he went blundering on, stepping into a trap he’d never thought to look for, much less avoid.

“me? are you kidding me?” Stretch said unthinkingly. “fuck no, i’d be the worst parent ever. plus, it’d be a hell of a lot of work to even get one, it’s not like either of us can get knocked up, so it’s adoption or a surrogate, probably take fucking years of effort to get a rugrat i wouldn’t even want, i—"

Right at the moment his own rambling words caught up with his brain, he saw the look on Edge’s face. 

Fuck.

Fuck, _fuck_ , he _knew_ that look, so carefully blank, emotions carefully caged and set aside because Edge didn’t want anyone to see them. Only, anyone didn’t usually include Stretch, not anymore, and Edge was concealing them now because he _did_ want, of course he’d fucking want, he volunteered to work with human kids every week, he’d drop everything to come help Stretch with the neighborhood brats, fuck, Stretch was so fucking stupid, how could he even _be_ this stupid?

“oh. i…uh…” Stretch stammered, frantically trying to think of a way to backpedal. The worst part was that he’d meant it, he _didn’t_ want kids, a part of him cringed away from even thinking about it, but the way he’d said it, by the angel, he couldn’t have been crueler.

“We can talk about this later,” Edge interrupted smoothly. Helping him, giving him an out, the way Edge always did when he fucked up. Only, Edge couldn’t help pull him out of this hole, he’d well and truly dug it when Stretch had married him and hadn’t even thought about kids, hadn’t even considered it. Edge wanted them and he didn’t and Edge had married him thinking they were going to have that while Stretch had only been thinking of himself, he…he was…

The lights which had seemed so pretty only minutes before were suddenly overwhelming, the sweet sugar on his tongue nauseatingly thick no matter how hard he tried to swallow it away. People moved past them, jostling them as they went, not unkindly, only briskly going on their way while they stood still in the middle of the pathway. He was shaking, Stretch realized dimly, but that thought seemed terribly distant, lost, and he barely heard Edge saying his name with concern. All his thoughts were caught up in a dizzying circle, reminding him that he’d screwed this up so badly, he’d fucked up everything, he had, him.

“Come on.” 

Stretch almost staggered at the sudden yank on his arm, pulling him to the side. He was sat down with jarring force, his head pushed downward between his knees.

“Breathe.” A command, loud and firm, and Stretch obeyed it, sucked in air sharply. The rush of oxygen mingling with his magic cleared his head and gravity did the rest, until the looming faintness that he hadn’t even realized was overwhelming him faded.

Edge’s hands were cool on his cervical vertebra and belatedly Stretch realized he’d actually taken off his gloves. There was nothing but bare bones against his own, gingerly stroking him with sharpened fingertips. That was a hell of a clue of how badly he’d shaken Edge, he hardly ever took off his gloves. 

Carefully, Stretch sat up. The hands on his neck bones didn’t draw away, only shifted to cup his face. Edge was crouching in front of him, his eye lights searching his face. 

His awareness of their surroundings came back with wavering abruptness. He was sitting on a wooden bench. Cold dampness was seeping in through his jeans, but there was surprising warmth washing over him soothingly. Bewildered, he looked up to see a weird contraption next to the bench that looked like a dim streetlight and it was only now that he was sitting underneath it that Stretch realized it was an outdoor heater of some sort. Well, fuck, if he'd seen this damn thing the whole cocoa issue wouldn't have happened, and Edge's line of questioning would never have come up.

No surprise that he hadn’t. The universe was not fond of granting him small favors. 

Edge’s thumb scraping over his cheekbone focused his attention. “Breathe, love.” 

“I am breathing.” It sounded too churlish, petty and whiny, but Edge only nodded.

“You are, you’re doing just fine.”

“i’m sorry.” 

“You never need to apologize, love, I—”

“no,” Stretch interrupted, forcing words past the thickness in his throat. “i’m sorry about…about the kids. i should’ve said something before. i should have.”

“You don’t need to apologize for that, either.”

His voice was so gentle and Stretch had to close his eyes against it, tears stinging for the second time that night. “don’t try to tell me you haven’t been thinking about having kids.”

Edge exhaled slowly. “All right. Since we seem to be talking about this now, then yes, I have considered having children with you. With you,” he stressed. His thumbs stroked softly along Stretch’s cheekbones. “And if children are not something you want, then we won’t.”

“but—”

“Listen to me now,” Edge said, a touch sharply. “Are you listening?” He waited for Stretch to nod. “I might have considered having children, but I want more for you be happy.”

“that isn’t fair!” Stretch burst out. “you deserve to be happy!”

“Who is saying I won’t be?” Edge countered. “I’m happy right here and now, with you. And there isn’t any fair or unfair about it. We aren’t balancing compromises on a scale, love.”

Stretch could taste the tears now, thick and hot. “i don’t want you to regret or…or resent…i don’t…”

“Rus, you know that I don’t lie to you,” Edge told him with quiet intensity, “and I am not now. I can’t say I won’t have regrets. I can’t promise that. But in a discussion of whether or not to have children, no outweighs yes. The entire point would be a child _with_ you. I certainly don’t want one without you. A life without you is not a life I want.” He sighed. “Listen, we can talk more about this later if you want, but for now, let’s settle on no children, all right?”

Before he could say anything else, another voice interrupted them. “Is everything okay?”

The unfamiliar voice made them both startle. Stretch looked over Edge’s shoulder to see a young woman watching them warily. There was an event badge on a lanyard around her neck. 

“We’re fine,” Edge said, quietly. 

She nodded a little but stepped forward anyway, crouched in front of Stretch.

“Hey, um…friend?” she said gently. “Everything okay?”

Nervous but determined, and Stretch realized a little hysterically that the Human was thinking maybe he needed protection from _Edge_. Even better, she was struggling with what gender he was; Humans didn’t do well on that with Monsters as a whole, and skeletons wrapped in three layers against the cold made even a guess difficult. A Monster would simply ask their preference, but Humans were weird about that shit.

Gotta respect her intention, although how the hell had he gotten the ‘sweet Monster in distress’ vibe and how did the fuck did he get rid of it?

Undyne would laugh her ass off. 

“i’m fine,” Stretch managed and gave her a wobbly smile, “thanks, friend. and he or sir is good, but you can call me stretch.”

She nodded again and didn’t budge an inch. Edge seemed to have caught on to her intention and probably only Stretch could see the reluctant amusement in his expression. 

Of course _he’d_ think it was funny, Edge had a twisted damn sense of humor, and he was always appreciative of anyone being overprotective of Stretch. Nice that some Humans were looking out for him but still irritating. How the hell people thought Edge was so threatening, Stretch didn’t understand. He was wearing a knitted hat with snowflakes on it, for crying out loud.

“Edge? Stretch?”

All three of them looked up at that to see Jeff and Antwan coming up to them. They were hardly recognizable themselves, bundled into coats and hats and gloves, but Jeff didn’t so much as pause, scrambling to sit next to him, and both of them were visibly concerned. 

Wonderful, that tripled the audience. Damn it all to hell. This was not the kind of outing that Stretch had planned on. 

tbc


	4. Chapter 4

* * *

Not for the first time, Edge was grateful that Stretch had found a close friend aside from himself and his brother. For all the acquaintances he had, all his Twitter followers and his neighborhood minions, Jeff was the first true friend he’d had or at least the first that Edge knew about.

From the beginning, Jeff had helped Stretch, first physically and then…well. Like right now, sitting next to him on a snow-dusted bench. Visibly concerned and yet careful not to touch until Stretch caught his hand and gave it a friendly squeeze. 

Stretch gave Jeff a wan smile. “what are you two doing here?”

“You’ve been tweeting all night,” Jeff grinned. “We thought we’d come down and check it out.” His smiled faded a little and his tone was careful as he asked, “You okay?”

As difficult as it was to step back and let Jeff take over, Edge managed, watching as his husband nodded. Considering that he was the cause of Stretch’s panic, it might be best if he could focus on someone else for a moment or two. 

Not exactly how he’d imagined that conversation going, he thought tiredly, and certainly he hadn’t meant to put a damper on the evening by bringing up a delicate subject that should have been discussed in private. But seeing Stretch with that Human child, their laughter as they’d made faces for the camera, it had put him in the thought of seeing Stretch with another child, one who was theirs, an extension of their love. 

Stupid and thoughtless of him to bring it up that way, but he hadn’t expected that reaction at all. The swiftness in which Stretch had gone pale as milk, the magic draining from his face, had been utterly shocking. He was still a little pale, his eye lights smaller than normal. 

For whatever reason, it seemed the subject was a painful one, far more than Edge would have guessed. Oh, he'd considered that Stretch might prefer to stay childless, that wasn’t a complete surprise on its own. It did make a twinge of longing clutch in Edge’s soul, a faint yearning that he set firmly aside. For now, he simply wanted to be sure Stretch was all right. 

Fortunately, he wasn’t the only one. 

The young Human woman, Pamala by her name tag, seemed to have decided Edge was safe enough, or at least that he wasn’t going to rip anyone’s throat out with his teeth. She stood up, allowing Jeff and Antwan to move in closer.

“I didn’t mean to intrude,” she said apologetically. “But after what happened earlier, we wanted to make sure the rest of the night went smoothly for you."

“What happened earlier?” Edge asked, frowning. That he had missed something else was an unwelcome revelation. 

“eh, nothing,” Stretch said, in that light voice that meant it had absolutely been something. Difficult as it was, Edge resisted glaring at him and instead made a mental note to get some answers when Stretch looked less like a stiff breeze would send him to the ground. “and i’m fine, just a little light-headed. we need to get going, though, we’ll miss the tree lighting.”

“You sure?” Jeff asked, worriedly. He flicked a glance at Edge and he could see his own concern reflected in blue eyes, silently questioning. Edge shook his head slightly; no, this wasn’t from his past illness, this was less bacteria or germs, and more that Stretch had married a fool who should have known better than to bring something like that up in a public space. 

“Do you need a wheelchair?” Pamala asked helpfully, “We have one over at the first aid station."

Tempting as the idea was, from the look on Stretch's face anyone who attempted to get him into a wheelchair was going to end up needing it themselves. 

Edge would honestly have preferred to simply go home. But he knew Stretch wanted to see the tree lighting and he would be crushed if they missed it. More than that, ending the evening on this note didn’t sit well with Edge, not after Stretch had so carefully planned this outing. The last thing he needed after a panic attack was a layer of disappointment. But neither did Stretch seem steady enough to walk to the pavilion.

Unexpectedly, it was Jeff who saved them. 

“Nah, we don’t need a chair. I'll give you a piggy back ride, Bonejangles," Jeff teased, giving Stretch nudge.

"stop," Stretch snorted, shoving him back.

"Seriously! How much can you possibly weigh?"

"you can't just ask people that!"

"Except I did,” Jeff grinned. “Come on, it'll be funny."

Stretch was visibly wavering, a very telling sign that he really didn't feel up to walking to the lighting ceremony. 

"I doubt he would weigh fifty pounds soaking wet and wearing hiking boots," Edge said, dryly. As expected, Stretch took the bait and gave him an indignant look, sputtering about how ‘that was fucking private, edgelord, for crying out loud!’

Jeff only blinked, pushing his hat out of his eyes with one mittoned hand. "Wow, really? I guess I didn't think about how much a skeleton weighs."

"edge weighs more than me, his bones are denser," Stretch muttered irritably. 

"Good thing I didn't offer to carry him, then. Come on, let's go!" He clambered to his feet and turned around. His arms were held out exaggeratedly while Jeff looked over his shoulder in expectation. 

Stretch huffed. "oh, all right."

From Pamala’s bemused expression, this hadn’t been on her mental list of how this might turn out. To begin with, Jeff had been right. Considering that Stretch was well over six feet tall and Jeff was a full head and a half shorter than him, watching him cart Stretch on his back was hilarious. Stretch’s legs dangled ridiculously, his long arms around Jeff’s neck as Jeff trotted along, and when Stretch pushed his cold skull against the bare skin at the back of the Human’s neck, he let out a shrill squeal of dismay. 

He did not, however, so much as let Stretch wobble in his grip. That was reassuring enough that Edge was able to relax a little, trailing behind them. Next to him, Antwan had his phone out and before Edge could bitch at him for his obsessive email checking, he caught sight of the screen. 

“Are you recording them?”

“Hell, yes,” Antwan agreed. “You kidding? Stretch would be pissed if we didn’t!”

Truer words.

The pavilion was crowded, the large fir tree in the center still darkened, and Pamala led them around the side to a smaller deck, taking them past a sign that said, ‘Employees Only’.

“You can get a good view here and there’s chairs in case you need to sit down again,” Pamala told them, leading them out to what looked to be a luncheon area. It was elevated enough to provide good perspective of the unlit tree. “Don’t worry, you’ll be safe here.”

“Thank you,” Edge told her quietly, although her words were tellingly ominous. Oh, he and Stretch were going to talk about this later, that was certain, even if he had to enlist his brother in finding out what precisely happened. Knowing Red, he was already making a dossier. 

With marked gentleness, Jeff set Stretch back on his feet and the moment he had his balance, Edge stepped up behind him, sliding his arms around him. Their differences in height meant that he had an excellent view of the back of Stretch's head and not much else. 

He didn't care. No decorated tree was ever as important to him as feeling Stretch lean back into his embrace, allowing Edge to take his weight. He settled his gloved hands over Edge’s, twining their fingers together. 

Edge sighed quietly, resting his cheek against the collar of Stretch’s coat and shutting his sockets, holding his husband close. Trying somehow to import to him how much he was loved, hoping that the little seed of doubt he’d accidentally sown about his own happiness didn’t take root. He was happy, perfectly happy, and a child wouldn’t have been the icing on a cake so much as it would have been another frosting rose on a cake already filled with them.

It hadn’t been that long ago he’d been content with a life on his own, with his work and his volunteering. Content was not happy, he’d learned. He knew the difference, now.

“I love you,” he whispered, needing to say it. Next to them, Antwan was holding Jeff equally close and he could only hope they were sharing similar words. 

Stretch’s grip tightened briefly. “i know you do.” Edge might have taken it as flippant if he hadn’t pulled their joined hands up, pressing a kiss against Edge’s ring where it was hidden beneath bulky winter gloves. “i do know. i love you, too.” 

Those soft words meant more to him than any possible hypothetical child, warming him against the chilly wind and he felt more than heard Stretch gasp, the soft glow of lights shining brilliantly from around him and pretty as that well-lit tree surely was, Edge only cared about the lovely creature in his arms, in his soul. In his heart.

* * *

It was a harder sell for Stretch to allow Jeff to carry him to their car, the joke was only funny once, after all, but he finally agreed when Antwan offered. Being that he was taller, it was a little less preposterous visually, but when the ridiculous carols that the three of them warbled out were added in, it was definitely a sight. 

Edge kept three steps back, wincing as they hit a particularly sour note in their rendition of ‘Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer.’ There was no possible way he could claim not to know them but at least he wouldn’t be included in any of the videos he could see the other Humans recording. Well, Stretch did always enjoy it when he was trending on Twitter. 

After a few moments of furious whispering between Jeff and Stretch that he carefully didn’t listen to, they were in the car speeding towards home, the heater blasting warm air at full strength. 

He thought Stretch was drowsing, his head leaning against the window; not a surprise, he’d had a hell of a night.

But his voice was terribly awake as he said softly, “edge?”

Edge kept one hand on the wheel, reaching over to take Stretch’s with the other, “What, love?”

He was quiet long enough that Edge thought he’d drifted off, after all. Until he finally said, softer still, “my hp wouldn’t be fair for a kid. it’s bad enough with you.”

“Don’t,” Edge began, choking on the word. He took a steadying breath and went on, “As you are so fond of reminding me, you’re older than I am, and you’ve survived this long.”

“yeah, but,” Stretch hesitated. His eye lights were a soft glow in the dark car interior. “i don’t want to say this and i know you don’t want to hear it, but i won’t always be so light on my feet. it’s bad enough i’ve got you, at least you’re an adult. i can’t do that to a kid. i can’t.”

Stretch was right about one thing, he didn’t want to hear that. But he understood. 

Growing up with Red made him terribly aware of the limitations of low HP. But he also knew that there was no point in letting it keep anyone from living their life and he was not about to let it hold Stretch back from anything, everything, that he wanted. Nor would Edge force him to accept anything he didn’t.

“It’s all right, Rus,” Edge said, gently. “I’m sorry I sprung that on you the way I did.” He hushed Stretch when he made a noise of protest. He added, dryly, “Besides, between you and my brother, there are plenty of times I feel like I’m already raising a couple of children.”

If Stretch’s laugh sounded a little strained, at least it was a laugh. His grip on Edge’s hand was a little too tight, his fingers pinching even through their gloves. Edge didn’t care. The hint of pain was something to focus on. 

“at least you don’t have to raise my bro,” Stretch pointed out. “been there, done that.”

“That’s true. I don’t think we’d suit.” Edge pitched his voice higher, adding a note of borderline maniacal cheer, “I had a good time tonight, brother.”

That earned him a more genuine laugh, Stretch snickering until he was breathless, “oh, fuck, don’t _do_ that, it’s disturbing.”

“But Pappy, I love you sooo much!” Edge said, singsong, and now Stretch was collapsing into his seat, howling. 

“stop,” he begged, wheezing, “please stop, he doesn’t sound like that, you dick.”

He sounded pretty damn close to that, Edge thought with a smirk of his own. Stretch’s laughter eased and he shifted in his seat, settling so that he was leaning against Edge’s shoulder. It made driving a little awkward but not much and they rode on in silence. 

He could tell the moment Stretch really fell asleep, his breathing deepening, evening out. That was fine, they were close to home and if he was asleep, he wouldn’t be able to protest Edge carrying him from the car. It was a win-win, after a long evening, one that had been surprisingly perilous for a simple winter festival.

Still, Edge could at least say that, despite everything, it had been a good night.

-finis-


End file.
